How can relaxation foster children’s emotional well-being?

By Valesca da Costa Gehrs

During your own experience with yoga and meditation, you’ve probably already tried observing your thoughts. Are your thoughts about yourself positive or negative? We’re often too hard on ourselves, and so are kids. They often say, “I’m not good at that,” “I’m not smart,” or “I can’t do it.” Thankfully, yoga can help kids change their self-talk!

In yoga, emotional problems are considered to be an imbalance between manas shakti (mental energy) and prana shakti (vital energy). Excessive mental energy is the origin of depression, anxiety and lethargy, while an excess of prana is the cause of aggressiveness and disturbing behaviour. We know that the breath, the mind and the emotions are intimately linked together. The goal of yoga is to restore harmony through poses (Asanas) and breathwork (Pranayama).

Stress and pressure

Children’s negative thoughts and emotional difficulties result from stress and pressure that they experience from a very young age, whether it’s caused by their parents, busy schedules or difficult transitions. As well, the competitiveness of our society (which is more present in some environments than in others) is reflected in children’s vision of the world, school, their siblings and themselves. Little by little, children begin to believe that they aren’t good enough or smart enough. They become increasingly dependent on validation from their peers and less likely to recognize their own strengths and virtues.

Relaxation: A gateway to well-being

How can yoga keep negative self-talk from becoming permanently ingrained as children grow older? Speaking as a children’s yoga teacher, relaxation is the gateway through which children can learn about emotional well-being. This is because through the practice of relaxation, children learn to go within and recognize what they are experiencing, which helps them to take it further. Little by little, relaxation gives children the chance to know themselves better through the sensations of their body and the feelings of acceptance and trust that arise. Relaxation and trust help children develop self-love. In turn, they need less outside validation. Gratuitous compliments and praise from adults (“Bravo!” “Good job!” “You’re great!”) aren’t as useful as showing legitimate interest in what children experience, feel or express. The challenge is not about loving children. It’s about teaching them to love themselves from the inside out.

At home, you can introduce children to relaxation by setting an example – as Einstein said, “setting an example is the only means of influencing another.” If parents take relaxation breaks, kids are sure to be intrigued, making it easier to enjoy the time spent relaxing. I believe that it is up to us as parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, teachers and facilitators to help children take responsibility for their well-being by offering them accessible tools that are adapted to their age.

Relaxation and learning

What’s more, children who learn to manage their stress themselves are more likely to thrive at school and do well with their studies. No matter the educational setting, relaxation can be very beneficial in the form of moments of calmness: gentle movements, breathing, visualization, etc. When moments of relaxation are interspersed throughout the day’s activities, they help kids integrate what they have learned while reinforcing the parasympathetic nervous system, which is responsible for our ability to relax.

In closing, from the point of view of children’s yoga, relaxation and self-confidence are essential factors for their emotional well-being and consequently, for their success in school.

Once kids have “tasted” relaxation, they are ready to “inhabit” poses and “understand” breathing in order to go deeper towards meditation and in-depth practices. By becoming aware of the power that yoga offers them, children learn to become more and more emotionally independent, prepared to face difficulties with more ease and self-confidence. If a five-year-old can go get a band-aid for the scrape on her knee, she can also learn to take care of her emotional well-being by opening the “medicine cabinet” of yoga.

Here are some suggested links to practice relaxation with kids (in French):

• A short relaxation in the form of a story to help kids take their first steps towards relaxation:
  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4iTPgErZEUE
• A longer visualization with a little kitten that is very relaxing:
  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rjUHs8qXT1I
• Yoga nidra for kids who already have some experience with relaxation:
  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fza9RW9NGTQ
• A beautiful relaxation for teens :
  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=77kFjXj-gnA